Quiet Tennis

this is a true story.i was on a cruies 4 or 5 yrs back,tui,sorta butlins at sea.me and the lass got roped in for a version of mr+mrs.one of our questions was what was the most memorable/erotic/unusual place you've made love,blokes first.i played safe cos I aint stupid,south Africa,lions etc,fairly memorable and a damn sight safer than a lotta the answers I could have given!the old boy next to me(part of a group all on holiday together)who must have been near 80 was a little less clever or probably more drunk,even so he thought twice and said"i cant really tell you,the missus would kill me"but they talked him into it."one new years eve me and the missus was coming home from the pub and as we went past the bowling club we ended up having it right there on the bowling green,anyone could have walked past and seen us"ok says the compere,lets fetch the girls back in.fair play to his missus she said exactly the same.the compere says"blimey im surprised you can remember that far back"she says "what are you talking about new years eve was only 6mnths back?"the entire place collapsed laughing.it gets better,they got back to their table and after what later turned out to be summat of an inquest one of these senile delinquents starts shouting and screaming and another that id played a quiz with earlier was laughing so hard that im fairly sure he shat out his own prostate!take a wild guess at what club they all belonged to?yup,that bowling club,turned out the guy shouting the odds was well known for being a poor sport and when playing a shot that he thought had won a game had the habit of kissing the green,wanna take a bet on what part of the green this would normally occur?yup,ground zero at the crinkly love in!needless to say they never had to buy a beer for the rest of the cruise but the indoor bowls crowd watched em VERY closely